This week I found myself (very belatedly) writing out thank you cards for Nolan’s first birthday. As I sat down with my Target stationery and started to write, it occurred to me that I had no idea whose perspective the card was supposed to be coming from. Was I supposed to write the card like a baby? Or as myself? The dilemmas of motherhood know no limit, really.
I think we can agree this is a weighty question. And as with all weighty questions, your best bet for answers is Facebook.
From Facebook I received a variety of responses on this controversial matter. Here are some of my favorites:
- “Everyone knows a baby can’t write.” (True fact)
- “Have a few glasses of wine and it will all work itself out.” (Already done)
- “Avoid monogrammed stationary from a child under five. I guess I shouldn’t say that, it could be cute, but I always think: does this child work on Wall Street?” (Nolan actually does moonlight on Wall Street, but this is still a good point)
Nolan caught wind of my question and was embarrassed that I had revealed our family to be so clueless. “Mom,” he said, “you’re making us look like losers.”
“Oh Nolan,” I said, “It’s ok, I make us look like losers all the time!“
In the end, Nolan insisted that he dictate the thank you notes to me, because, and I quote “You have impeccable penmanship, mom, and also I am lazy.” I had to agree on both counts. And with that, here are some examples of our joint effort:
Dear Uncle Matty,
Thank you for starting a 529 plan for me. Clearly my parents did not have their shit together to do this for me. I’m not even sure my mom knows what a 529 plan is. Luckily for me I have a Godfather who knows what’s what. You can be both my spiritual AND financial advisor.
Love, Nolan
Dear Annie,
Thank you for my birthday presents! My “More Bears” book is, I believe, a classic. I cannot read yet, but I often chew on it, and it tastes like a classic to me. I have a refined palate. Also, thank you for the Target Gift card! If I’m being honest I think my mom stole that from me.
Love, Nolan
Dear Linda & Greg,
Thank you for all of my awesome Elmo birthday presents! Elmo is one of my greatest idols, alongside Peppa Pig and Elvis. He radiates greatness, and now that greatness is radiating all over me.
Love, Nolan
I’m really wiped out from all of this effort. Also, I think my puree was spiked.
What about the rest of you? How do you handle thank you notes from kids who can’t do them on their own? Do you put in thought and care, or do you just say screw it all and go this route: Can We Stop With The Goody Bags and Thank You Cards. Inquiring moms want to know.
I think I’m a rare breed of woman who still believes in writing thank you cards. I wrote them for my high school graduation money and one family member sent more money (hooray!). I wrote one to my husbands grandmother the first time I met her and she sent me a “thank you for your thank you card” and we’ve been besties ever since. I have written thank you cards for my oldest’s first and second birthdays and I will for my youngests first birthday in two months. I think Mimi’s “thank you for the thank you” sealed it up for me. I will always write them. Plus I’m an English major and I think writing anything is a dying art that shouldn’t be dying.
Wow that is really nice that Mimi was so pleased with your efforts! That note (for having met her) was above and beyond in a nice way so I can see why she’d appreciate it.
As for regular thank you cards, in my experience pretty much everyone does them. I always get them when I give a gift, and I always send them. So I guess at least in my circle it’s alive and well as a practice!
I know this is a polarizing debate but I still believe that if someone is nice enough to get your kid a gift, they deserve a thank-you card. That being said, we do all know that babies can’t write but, you gotta admit that writing them from the baby’s perspective is just more fun for everyone… If someone thinks it’s lame, tell them not to give your kid a gift next year and wish them good luck with finding their obviously-lost soul… You should also maybe question why you’re friends with this person. PS: your example thank-you notes above are hysterical and I’d venture to guess that the recipients of them laughed rather than thinking “duh Liz, you obviously wrote this, not Nolan!” Great post!
I agree, it is much more entertaining to write thank you cards as the baby. I know some people will think it’s lame (not people I know in real life, but people in the world) but it is funnier! For Nolan and me it’s a collaborative process. We are artists that way.
This post is “winning!” I’m sure if Charlie Sheen followed your blog, he’d agree. (I have saved possibly all your notes to me. From time to time I like to re-read nice or funny correspondence, which warms the heart.)
You know, that is one really great thing about letters. I save many myself. And I have several of yours from years back!
Since my son’s first birthday party is coming up next week, this post has made up my mind. I shall let Levi dictate the thank you cards. I think the recipients would very much appreciate Levi’s thoughts and appreciation.
You continuously make me laugh with your blog posts. Keep them coming. 🙂
PS I wish we could be friends IRL.
Isabel, good call. Levi, though I don’t know him personally, is likely full of deep thoughts that should be shared with your friends and family. Don’t hold Levi back. Step up and be his ghost writer, and you will all be the richer for it. (Not actually richer, that was just a figure of speech).
I am writing all of my baby’s thank you notes with this in mind from here on out.
Yes! I was hoping that this blog would be an inspiration. When you write out the notes, please just end with “This thank you card was inspired by A Mothership Down”. Your friends and family won’t mind, it’s normal in some circles to end thank you cards with a shout out 🙂
Depends on the sense of humor of the person you’re writing it to. And even then I might write it in my daughter’s voice just to amuse myself, a very powerful motivation for me right now.
I’ve gone both directions, and by far it’s more entertaining to be your baby’s ghost writer….
I totally dropped the ball and forgot to send thank you notes after my son’s first birthday in September. Il now I’m thinking I need to send out belated notes.
SO funny! One of my “to-do’s” today is to write thank you notes for my daughters first birthday and yes, I was planning on writing them “from” her. Let’s face it, if we’re being honest, thank you notes can be boring to write (and to receive!) so why not throw in some creativity and pretend you’re a baby writing?!