1. Pick out paint chips at Home Depot with your significant other, while knowing that you have different tastes in paint chips.
2. Take paint chips home and hold them up to your front door, while your toddler whines and cries at your feet.
3. Take a short break.
4. Go back to front porch with paint chips and significant other, while leaving toddler in playroom just on other side of the door for 3 minutes.
5. Hear your toddler start to fuss and decide that you will allow toddler back on porch.
6. Try to open the front door and find out that it’s locked.
7. Panic.
8. Stop panicking when you realize that you have a Hide-A-Key.
9. Go get Hide-A-Key calm as can be.
10. Try Hide-A-Key in door and learn that the key is to your old door.
11. Call your parents and ask if they have the key.
12. Discover that nobody has the key.
13. Watch as your toddler becomes frantic on the other side of the door.
14. Call 911.
15. Wonder why on such a lovely day you have zero windows open on your first floor.
16. Get ready to fight your significant other over why the door was locked in the first place.
17. Have your sister come over to help try to find a way in.
18. Watch as your sister walks up to the front door and discovers that it is completely and totally UNLOCKED and sit there like morons as she walks right into your house and toward your screaming toddler.
19. Call 911 and cancel your emergency rescue.
20. Conclude that your toddler can now, apparently, lock and unlock your front door. Awesome. Make mental note that you need to use a deadbolt, and second mental note that you need a new Hide-A-Key.
21. Screw the paint chips. Prepare for a beer.
- The calm after the storm.
Unfortunately mastering the door lock is not a fine motor skill to be celebrated! My son (about 18 months old at the time) locked me out in our backyard with a deadbolt (no key hole on the outside) that is very conveniently located about 9 inches off our floor- clearly the installer did not have toddlers in mind- or maybe it was a toddler). At least Nolan cried- all I heard was laughing on the other side of my locked door! Thankfully my front door was unlocked (super safe with 2 young children, but in this case it was my lucky day!).
I think most likely your installer WAS a toddler. They like to stick together to make things dicey for their parents. It’s one of their hallmark traits.
That is terrifying! So glad that it all ended well. I think I’m going to go to the hardware store and look into door safety items. I have a feeling that we are not far from this (once Ellie starts to walk). Can never be too prepared!
I guess that means I should stock up on beer too, right?
Yes, beer and hardware. Both super important in these situations.
Oh my God! So sorry you had a majorly stressful day…but selfishly I am so appreciative of this comic relief. Never a dull moment, right?! I bet that was one of the best beers ever.
Okay- you simply must read my story over on my blog!! I hate to leave links!! But you will totally relate to it!! And btw- this is HILARIOUS!!!
Here’s the link to my story… http://themomcafe.com/one-of-those-days/
Oh girl- I feel your pain!!
Wow that story is nuts! I can’t believe your superhuman strength!! Now I want to go back to my house and see if I can tear a door off the hinges just to test myself.
amazing.