Missing the Old “You” After You Have Kids

When a child is born, there’s not just one new person in that hospital room, there are two.

There’s the baby, and there’s the new version of yourself. And as the years tick by you may miss that old you more and more.

I have, at least.

Before I had kids I loved to run. Half marathons, 10Ks, quick jogs on the trails in my town.

Since becoming a mother I’ve run less and less. In between having 3 babies I’ve managed to go on short little bursts where maybe I take a class at the YMCA here and there. But nothing at all like what I was doing before.

My third and final baby just turned a year old, and I am ready to start finding my old self again. The person who likes to run. The person who loves her kids but who also loves life as a fully separate person from my role as a mom.

Maybe you miss that version of yourself that went away for awhile when you had babies. Maybe you’re looking for her too.

In this next year, with my kids moving out of babyhood and into childhood proper, my goal is to start looking for her – for me – more often.

Today that looked like a 1 mile jog on the treadmill that’s been sitting unused in my bedroom for months now.

As I’m running, I can look at the photo of my baby girl on the wall in front of me. And at the same time I can see my own reflection, too.

Her, and me.

Sometimes it seems like it’s our kids OR ourselves. But maybe it won’t have to be that way forever.

Them AND me.

Them AND you.

There were 3 people in the hospital room that first day. The baby, the old you, and the new you. And even if that old you has been in the shadows for awhile, maybe she can come back out when the time is right.

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