On the spectrum of pleasurable summer activities, vacationing with a baby falls somewhere between getting a filling and waiting in line at the DMV in August, when the air conditioning is out. Which is to say, it’s an exceedingly comfortable endeavor, painless and quite relaxing.
The relaxation starts the moment you conceptualize the trip and start making calls to various B&Bs, only to find that most of them won’t accept you as a guest. The problem, it turns out, is that people go to B&Bs for R&R. And you know what the biggest impediment to R&R is? Your baby.
Once you manage to secure “family friendly” lodging (code for “lodging that’s not nice enough for people without children to agree to stay in”), the zen feelings continue to roll over you as you pack. Packing for your family only takes about 10-12 man hours, which is really great and not at all irritating, because even if you take the full 12 hours that’s only half of a day, which is like 50% of a day. The other half is wide open! Spend that open time however you’d like, folks. The options are limited only by your imagination.
You need all this prep time because packing for a family vacation is like moving to a foreign country where it’s unclear if you’ll have access to basic supplies (Do they even sell batteries in Peru? Who knows! Better pack 50 Duracells!), and you can’t risk being caught unprepared so far afield. So you overcompensate by packing enough shit for the Gosselins and the Duggars combined. Think you’ll need a few dozen diapers
The first time we took Nolan on vacation it was to a dumpy family-friendly bed and breakfast in North Conway, a small ski town known for its shops and mountains. We said, “It will be quaint, it will be simple, it will be LOVELY!”
Nolan on his first family vacation. You can tell this is a B&B from the wrought iron bedpost and the forgivingly dark-toned comforter.
And yes, it was quaint. What’s not quaint about spending from 8 PM on every night trapped in a tiny, pitch-black room with your tenuously sleeping baby, unable to turn on the TV or even a light, lest you awaken the beast? What’s more relaxing than living in fear that your child will start wailing through the paper thin walls of the B&B, disturbing the other guests (who you will not be able to avoid on account of the fact that you must eat breakfast with them)? It’s a slice of heaven, really.
Parents, there is a better way. A legitimately relaxing option for vacationing with a baby. The key is this: skip the B&B and rent a house. Moreover, screw the intimate family time for just you, your spouse and children. You see enough of them as it is. Book a vacation with an entire network of babysitters (grandparents, aunts, neighbors, newspaper delivery boys, etc.), and stay in a house that is already way better stocked than your own house. This is exactly what my family did last week, and the results were stellar.
Vacationing with this many people ensures that you’ll have at least one, maybe two, willing babysitters at any given time. *Results may vary based on the dependability of your newspaper delivery boy.
My sister’s good friend Meg was nice enough to rent her vacation house on the Cape to us for the week. What was awesome about this arrangement was that the house was completely set up for a family with a baby; it had the crib, a nursing chair, diaper station, bouncy chairs
Our bedroom/nursery. It’s at least 10 times the size of our room at home.
Nolan’s vacation crib. Yeah, this will do.
Even better than the setup was the excess of loving, willing hands eager to spend time with Nolan. One morning I woke up to a fussy baby and immediately had the thought, “I wonder if Grandpa Dan is up already and can entertain Nolan.” As soon as I come down the stairs, my dad says, “Maybe I can take Nolan for an early walk!”
Bingo.
“Sure, what a great idea!”
As if the idea hadn’t even occurred to me. Ha! It’s the ONLY thing besides a coffee run to Dunks that I’d thought of so far that day.
And it continued in this fashion. My mom got to read to Nolan and cuddle him. My sister gave him a bath.
Somebody gave him ice cream and entered him into a corn hole tournament.
Who the hell knows if anyone changed his diapers. Diffusion of responsibility, ya know? But let’s keep our eye on the big picture, here. Family fun/parental laziness.
Nolan was socializing with our friend Ben, and struck this pose completely unprompted. Well done, Nolan.
Nolan put his feet in the ocean for the first time. He was concerned about jelly fish, but I reminded him that, if he were to get stung, he could simply pee on his own foot and stop the pain instantly. This alleviated his fears. Personally I don’t think his aim is good enough to hit his foot, but why scare the boy?
A life lesson: Does Nolan look self-conscious on the beach? Does he look like his pasty skin and multiple rolls are preventing him from soaking in the sun? (Actually he was under a tent, but you catch my drift). No! This is a kid who knows how to let it all hang out in the spirit of fun. A kid who knows that it doesn’t take chiseled abs to WORK IT. This is an infant who KNOWS WHO HE IS. Ok he doesn’t actually seem to *technically* know who he is, but he’s displaying great confidence and a lack of self-consciousness that we could all learn from. Moms, take note.
I realize that I just encouraged moms to take Nolan’s lead and let it all hang out. Notice, however, that not only am I wearing a full coverage mom-suit, but I am also using Nolan as a shield. Do as I say, not as I do.
The vacation was as close to flawless as it could get. Although poor Nolan didn’t poop for the first 4 days, which I think we can all agree is a classic struggle for travelers everywhere. Better to learn this lesson now, I guess, when he’s only digesting milk and pureed veggies, instead of the way I learned it, on a trip to Argentina when I was backed up on two weeks of steak.
This was one of those trips that, simple as it was, I will remember. It gave us time to all be together without the pressure of doing much of anything. And isn’t that what sometimes makes for the best trips? The ones where you do nothing instead of doing everything. The ones that don’t need visitors guides and itineraries. The ones that just need family and friends. Also beer and yard games. But mostly, family and friends.
Thank you Cape Cod, I think I will relax.
backed up on two weeks of steak…oh Liz, every time I think you can’t be funnier…
Thanks Court! Nobody was laughing during the steak standoff in my gut, however.
Oh. My. Word. I was laughing so hard reading this because it’s all true! We took Ellie (3 months) to Northern Wisconsin (aka – Up North) where my parents have a cabin and it was so nice to have my parents and my sister and brother-in-law ready to play with Ellie at all times. Well, except when you can hear her go #2 from the other side of the lake. She’s not a shy pooper! Glad you got to have fun with Nolan and your family. I love reading your blog!
Not that this is on topic, but I love the name Ellie! It’s one of our top girl names. I’m very impressed that your Ellie’s poops are loud enough to hear at a distance….Nolan’s are sneakily quiet, whereby I don’t recognize that he’s packing heat, and let the situation marinate, if you will, for far too long.
Kudos to you for bringing a baby to the beach… we haven’t gotten there yet (I just keep thinking sand… stuck everywhere… sand for lunch… sand in her diaper…) and have stuck to the pool circuit for now. I do, however, agree that vacationing with other family/friends around is the way to go. I find myself talking to other people by pretending I’m feeding ideas to my baby… you know, like “Maybe Grandma wants to take you for a walk?” or “You know who loves feeding babies? Auntie does!” I’m sure all of the other adults in the room realize what I’m doing but they never call me out on it and the kid gets fed, played with and taken for walks while I get to do things like eat and shower in peace… score!
Mer, I do the exact same thing with the suggestions as to who might want to do what with the baby 🙂 As for the beach, I’ve been anti-beach with the baby because I’m such a mess there myself. However we were on the Cape for days on end, so it seemed like this was the time to give it a whirl. You know, with a tent and a big enough blanket it wasn’t as bad as I was imagining! And as you saw, Nolan looked stellar in his trunks.
Aw, looks like a wonderful trip. Sad to have missed it. Let Nolan know, he isn’t alone in his classic struggle. I’m sure you all enjoyed genuine camaraderie around the issue (considering the company on the trip) haha.
Toni, Nolan appreciates the support. I told him it was nothing to be ashamed of. We’ve all been there. The humanity!
Crying laughing. Two weeks of steak also got me. You are too funny.
Thanks Carla! I almost left the steak part out because I thought it was a bit graphic. Ha!
Our first little vacay was also to the Cape. We rented the saddest little “cottage” available (that means it was the cheapest – we were renting it alone). Within 24 hours, my 10 month old ate a random toenail that she found on the floor (not kidding), got a tick in her tiny bald head, and managed to stay awake the. entire. night. We vowed never to vacation again. Eventually the PTSD lifted and we manage to have progressively more successful vacations every year.
Woah, that is gross! A stray toenail!?? That is my nightmare! Actually it’s not my nightmare, but only because I’ve never thought of it before. Now that I’ve thought of it I’m pretty sure I’ll be having nightmares about it.
Yeah, a little piece of me died that day.
The ‘two weeks of steak’ comment got me as well; too funny. We have a time share in North Conway that we go to for a week each summer, but Dalton is only 3 months, so we opted for just a weekend this year. I think I was scarred by memories of taking our older daughter when she was 6 months old….she managed to take her diaper off in the pack and play during the night, and smear poop all over it and herself. Then, a few days later, somehow pooped through her swim diaper INTO the baby pool that was also being occupied by other babies who clearly had no problems controlling their bowels. Anyway, congrats on a successful vacation! You’ve given me hope! 🙂
Your daughter sounds amazing! Now THAT’S a girl who knows how to get her point across! Kudos to her. And good luck to you and Dalton on upcoming vacations 🙂
This is so spot on. We recently purchased a roof cargo carrier so we could “escape for the weekend” with Harrison. And forget my days of packing a half hour before we go away. These days I start my “lists” a month ahead of time. If I was tech savvy I would show you the picture of Jeff with TWO luggage carts full on our first family trip in April-ridiculous! At this point we can only drive places because I have no idea how to condense all the crap to manageable amounts two adults could handle in the airport. I also feel compelled to bring cases of water with me wherever we travel because I fear we will need it…and you know they don’t sell water in many places?!
Haha, Alison, I love it. It’s such a ridiculous procedure to do anything with kids! Who knew. Besides our parents and everyone else who has ever raised kids. The sheer volume of stuff involved in any venture with a baby still surprises me every time.
So true Liz, so true. I especially liked to see you using Nolan as a shield in photos, I do that with mine! Strategic. They might as well come in useful for something.
Looks like you had a lovely family holiday. Next stop, London, to stay with us?!? Hope so!! Though the packing for a flight is a whole different challenge and it will consume weeks of your time – but hey, it will be worth it, and think of the blog material 😉
Ahhh, Nic, I would love that! Maybe I’ll practice packing for a flight and just take my luggage to the airport, see if I can get through security with all of my gear, but then not fly anywhere. Then by the time I’m ready to visit you I’ll be a well oiled machine. Really, I would love to come over soon!!
Nicola, I don’t know you but I’m moving to London with my husband and toddler in two weeks… and if you like Liz’s blog, I think we’d get along famously. Hint: I’m looking for friends. 🙂 Per Liz’s recent mom group blog, it’s hard! So let me know if you’re open to it. XO, Casey
Casey, mind if I text Nicola your email address? That will be easiest! I told her about you and she’s happy to get in touch!
Wonderful post, as usual. Not sure if Nolan was laughing or crying whilst in the mouth of the shark. The situation warrants crying, but if he was laughing while posing, how cool is that! Can you please tell me what a corn hole is? (Note: Pretty sure this is my first time using ‘whilst.’ I only bring out Middle English when the forum deserves it.)
Lynda, Nolan was laughing whilst in the mouth of the shark! I don’t think he fully appreciates the dangers of the sea at this point in time.
Corn hole is a bean bag toss game 🙂 Highly entertaining and addictive, kind of like skee ball but in your yard.