Three kids vs. two kids is just…..a different ballgame. A ballgame played primarily by idealists, lunatics and the highly religious. I’ve just come to this realization as I am currently raising a 5 year old, two year old, and 4 month old ALL AT THE SAME TIME.
That’s right you guys, you have to raise them simultaneously. This must have been in the fine print somewhere because this fact was not front of mind in my family planning strategy.
Three kids is a lot – too many really to handle on my limited skill set. But I love them, and, anyway, I’m pretty sure I contractually agreed to raise them in an addendum to my birth plan.
*You should consult an attorney if you’re not totally clear on what terms you’ve agreed to when it comes to raising your own children.
The children look rather stern here. Like Captain Von Trapp’s children before Julie Andrews became their nanny.
It was clear to me that we, how do you say this nicely – OVERREACHED a bit on #3 when we forgot to pick up our middle child at day care on his second birthday.
Our newborn baby was just a few weeks old and we just, sort of….forgot about our son!
It happens.
(OK fine maybe it hasn’t happened to you. But it could! And it did. To us. NO JUDGEMENT!)
And they say middle children have a complex? Impossible to say how that develops, really, but I could put at least a casual wager on the “leaving at day care on your birthday” thing as a factor.
It’s just a hypothesis, and not the type that scientists can ethically test on the masses, so we will never know for sure.
Thank you, day care, for properly recognizing my son’s birth! Next year as his mother I promise I too will give this day the attention it deserves.
Anyway, back to 3 kids being too many kids all at once.
It just is.
Everyone says the whole “You’re outnumbered!” thing and “You’re switching to zone defense from man-to-man!” Whelp, it turns out that “everyone” was on to something!
I’ve always wanted a bigger family – growing up I thought I’d enjoy having 3-4 kids. It looked easy! Easy, to my foolish, oblivious child-mind.
But three kids vs. two kids is really no joke – and you know me…I like a good joke.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful for all three of my kids. I realize how lucky I am in this way, and I don’t take it for granted.
I can remember when having all my kids was only a dream. We have had a loss and a long journey. So I get it.
But back to my current dilemma which is that you have to actually rear these children.
They won’t just appear at your nursing home as fully formed adults, happy to reminisce with you about the glorious childhood you provided for them, without several decades of hard labor on your part.
They don’t just provide you with adorable grandchildren one day if you haven’t put in the time.
I bet a lot of you know this.
You’re like, yes, Liz, kids needs to be raised. I have always vaguely known it too, in some under-active part of my brain.
But this part of my brain isn’t always fully functional and does me no good WHATSOEVER at dinner each night when I’m trying to chat about Paw Patrol with a pre-schooler and nurse a newborn while throwing small scraps of hot dog at a toddler who for some reason WILL NOT EAT despite his rather husky build.
There is a word for all this, but it’s not a very fancy word. I think it’s “cluster” something.
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I’m so happy you’re back! I really enjoy your writing, and can totally relate as a severely outnumbered mom of 4! (9yr, 5yr, 3yr, 10 months). When my 3rd was 2 weeks old, i was loading up my kids in to our van, and conveniently nearly forgot the little guy at my parents. I said goodbye, walked out, closed the door, proceeded to walk to my van, suddenly stopped n said “oh, sh*t!”, turned around n proceeded to embarassingly grab my tiny infant, who was asleep in his carseat, as my mom laughed at me lol. And that my friend, is only the tip of my mom-fail iceberg. No judgements here! Best wishes to you❤
Kristen I don’t know why I never responded to this comment, but it’s probably on account of the whole “I have too many children to manage” situation. Anyway – thank you!! and no judgement about leaving behind your tiny infant. Haha.
I’m good with 2…… but my son is like a feral firecracker cannonball ?, and my daughter cries at the mere suggestion that I go outside and mow the back lawn but has absolutely no problem running away from me at the aquarium, museums, park, grocery store, Modells, etc….
So yeah, I’m good with 2. ??❤
You are bringing back so many memories that are now just a blurr. It does get a bit easier when they are all at the age when they are all able to walk into the car and buckle themselves in. Even easier when they can drive their own cars- at least you don’t forget to pick them up! At this point we only have to multi task FASFA applications, remembering to launder baseball uniforms before game day, making sure there is healthy food available for a growing teen boy, and trying to fit in family dinners at least a couple nights a week! All of which I have failed to do several times over thr past few years and everyone has survived. Its all good- you got this, Lizzy!!
JKH, I want to be you when I grow up! Your family is the best! And from what I can tell you *usually* remember to feed and clothe them, so…..winner!
This was so refreshing to read -a mom with perfect imperfections (as we all have) doing her best to love and take care of her kids. I felt like I was reading my life. I have three boys- the oldest is 4 going on 5 in October, middle is just over 2 1/2, and my baby just turned 1 last week. Sometimes I look around and can’t believe I have so much cuteness in one house. Other times, like when my middle one needs me to wipe him after going on the potty, my baby finds a pair of scissors and I’d Frankenstein walking with them, and my very talkative oldest wants to ask the most philosophical questions he’s ever thought of, I want to scream (let’s be real, I do scream) and pull my hair out! Keep the blogs coming, and stay strong! You’re doing great!
Kristie
We are both in the weeds!!! Good thing they’re cute.
Three is a lot! (don’t look at me like I’m nuts Moms of many more than 3!) I took a little break after my first 2 who were 2 years apart, but then I dove back into the deep end with a third. I thought it would be “easier” with my other 2 being 7 and 5 but (*spoiler alert*) turns out it’s still pretty hard some days! Also, now the big 2 are old enough to judge my parenting (like when the now 7 year old tells me “you need to watch your baby because he just got a knife off the counter”). Apparently I’ve forgotten all the safety precautions for toddlers (might need a refresher course!). And don’t get me started on how different it is after a few years of not having to get up off the floor at story time!
Oh yes I forget most things from one child to the next. I had to ask my sister, who just has her first baby, what type of sleep schedule a 4 month old should have. Even though I’m on Baby #3! Haha!